Category: Curhat Colongan

Curhat Colongan, lagi mellow, ngga jelas

When in Doubt…

Chic


Let me say this. I woke up this morning with some mixed funny feeling that hard to described. That feeling when you don’t even know what the f*ck you’re feeling.

Woke up? Kayak pernah tidur lebih dari setengah jam aja. 

Ya gitu. Kayak abis lari-lari. Ntah dari apa. Lari sejauh mungkin yang saya bisa.

That’s not new. You have been keep doing that lately. 

Well, maybe because I feel this life(-love) has been unsustainable and I have no reason to stay. Any reasons I could come up with are immaterial and, ultimately, wishful thinking. 😐

Well, c’mon! You’ve done it before, Chi. You know you’re capable of starting over. For example, you would be able to keep the same job or even get paid better if you moved to a certain somewhere. It’s just a house. It’s just stuff. It’s just a heart that has been so damn broken but still fully functional, no? And you are still breathing!

Some says, you are you wherever you go.

We never stay, and in the end, we lose everyone.

And the blame is on my self. I know you are gonna say how silly I am on keep doing on the same mistake, but I can’t help it! My heart that really so damn broken still need some certainty. Not that unworthy and unwanted feeling. I know I am doing wrong and I am regret that.

So now what? Wait for the email telling you it’s over? Wait for another saying if you can stay? Wait for another telling you if there’s any option other than burning it all down again?

…………….

Just keep waiting. It’s what you’re best at.

No. I’m not best of waiting. I’m best of hiding myself and faking a smile. And will do all over again.

and that’s what will broke you from inside.

I will be okay. Like, always.

…………….. Ngga capek?

Capek? I’m exhausted! Tapi siapa yang peduli. Well, now go. Ngapain masih balik-balik ke sini?!

Kamu tau banget kenapa saya masih di sini. You fighting a war inside your head every single day. If that’s not exhausting, I don’t know what it is.

…………………. I’m fighting the feeling trying to convince my head (and my heart) that everything was okay.

You know timing has a lot to do with everything, don’t you?

Please. You know I’m fighting YOU and saya ngga tau kenapa saya masih mendebat kamu sekarang. Get. Out. Of. My. Head! 😐

Curhat Colongan, lagi mellow, ngga jelas

Would You Dance With Me?

Chic

IMG_2648.JPG

And if my life was a storm
Would you dance with me in the rain?

Yogyakarta, 17 November 2014

Life’s a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don’t worry about what you don’t know
Life’s a dance you learn as you go
Life’s A Dance – John Michael Montgomery

Curhat Colongan

I Found You!

Chic

Gara-gara dengerin lagunya The Overtunes yang judulnya Sayap Pelindungmu, dan sebelum ketemu judul dan siapa penyanyi lagu ini, saya penasaran berhari-hari. Pertama gara-gara lagu ini persis banget sama lagunya Boyzone yang judulnya Centre of Gravity. Ngga taunya emang ternyata emang remake dari lagu yang sama. The Overtunes dapet kepercayaan dari si pencipta lagu ini buat bikin versi Indonesianya.

Ngga, saya ngga mau bahas lagunya. Lagunya bagus kok. Cuma kata-kata “I’ll Found You” yang ada dilagu itu yang bikin saya jadi tergugah.

((( TERGUGAH )))

Jadi, setiap kali denger lagu ini ada di radio dan kedenger kata-kata I’ll Found You itu, saya pasti langsung kebayang anak-anak kecil main petak umpet. Bhahahahahahak. Trus mikirnya jadi panjang gitu.

Panjang yang gimana?

Gini..

*mulai sok filosofis*

*dihajar massa*

😆 😆 😆

Oke sabar… sabar. Ini saya lanjutin dulu. :mrgreen:

kids-playing-hide-and-seek.-Free-Summer-fun.

Gini.. gini.. Masih inget ngga jaman kita dulu suka main petak umpet? Begitu yang jaga mulai ngitung dari 1 sampe berapa pun sesuai kesepakatan, kita semua langsung mencari-cari tempat ngumpet paling oke menurut kita. Tempat ngumpet yang pokoknya ga bakal ketauan deh.

Terus satu per satu temen-temen kita ketemu sama yang jaga. Satu per satu terdengar teriakan dan tawa khas anak kecil yang udah ketauan ngumpetnya itu.

Tinggal kita sendiri yang masih bertahan ngumpet. Rasanya jumawa kan yeeee…

Tapi inget ngga berapa lama kita merasa jumawa sama tempat ngumpet kita. Ga ada lima menit dari sejak yang jaga mulai nyari-nyari kita. Lebih dari itu, waktu yang jaga ngga nemu-nemu kita, mulai deh kita bikin-bikin keributan kecil. Mulai dari nongol-nongolin kepala, tangan atau kaki sedikit-sedikit, cekikikan kecil yang dibuat-buat dan lain-lain, cuma supaya yang jaga bisa nemuin kita. Ga ketemu juga? Kita malah dengan sengaja keluar dari tempat ngumpet trus buru-buru ke tempat jaga dengan tujuan supaya temen kita yang jaga kalah. Tapi, tetep intinya, cuma pengen nunjukin, gue tuh ada lhooo.. gue di sini lhooooo….

Ayo, ngaku ga? Gitu kan mainnya? Saya sih dulu gitu. *maksa* 😆

Karena, pada akhirnya, we all want to be found. Right? :mrgreen:

trus hubungan lagu sama petak umpet?

Curhat Colongan, iseng!

When Morning Has Broken..

Chic

How you enjoy your morning? Rise and shine with smile even-though it’s Monday? Have your morning coffee and light breakfast, then happily driving to the office? :mrgreen: Atau bangun terburu-buru satu jam setelah alarm bunyi, lompat dari tempat tidur, nyamber handuk masuk kamar mandi, mandi dan dandan tergesa-gesa, boro-boro sarapan, trus berjuang melawan kemacetan jalanan sampai ke kantor?

morning coffee with a dream
morning coffee with a dream

So which one is your morning? 😛

All my life, I never been to be a morning person. Not once. Well yeah, I’m a night owl. Tidur selalu larut malam. Bukan insomnia sih, tapi memang selalu tidur di atas jam 12 malam aja. Padahal sih udah di tempat tidur dari jam 9 malam. 😆

pagi-pagi itu..

Curhat Colongan

6!

Chic

Vio candle

This young boy turn to 6 years old today. He’s going to leave the kindergarten soon!

I don’t know if you will be a vet, a professional F1 racer as you dream of or the next president. But I know that you are one of the rock and roll boy in the world!

Now, I feel old. Really old. Haha.

Happy birthday, Big Boy!