Curhat Colongan, Seputar Kedodolan

Jakarta Pagi Ini

Eh mudah-mudahan sih gue ngga dituntut sama Slank gara-gara judul posting itu… hahahahahaha

Cuma mau curhat aja kalo gue cintaaaaaaa banget ma Jakarta pagi ini. Ngga panas (sejuk banget malahan….), trus ngga macet… gue dari rumah ke kantor cuma 10 menit aja gitu loooh… Coba kalo hari biasa… bisa 45 mennit!!!
Hwaaaaaah… asli gue suka banget ma Jakarta hari ini!!!

Andaikan jakarta tiap hari kayak gini yaaaa… *yeaaaah keep on dreaming, dreamer….*

Sooooo… holiday is coming. I’m going for vacation tommorrow… hehehe
Jadi ini bakal jadi posting terakhir gue di tahun 2006.
Last but not least, chi mau ngucapin SELAMAT IDUL ADHA  buat temen-temen yang ngerayain, and HAPPY NEW YEAAAAAAAAR………………….

Happy Holiday guys… I see u next year…. xoxoxo

Curhat Colongan, Seputar Kedodolan

12 Step Program

Okay, so I know several people who have addictions. Something as small as caffeine or chocolate…. to the larger players such as narcotics and alcohol. I have been trying to walk through my own 12 step program. My addiction, if I had to narrow one down today would be that I put too much faith in the people around me. Sure, this sounds okay…but as of latest (maybe the last 7 months) this has not worked in my favor. Being nice and trusting is not a good characteristic when the world is full of people who love to prey on people like me. Yes, I’m getting a thicker skin. I’m starting my own ’12 steps to growing out of being a pushover program’. My list looks a little like this:

1) When I greet people, stop saying… "hi.. how are you". Instead, I’m going to say things like, "Good morning" or "Hi there" and leave my salutations at that.
2) Talk to less strangers (unless I’m somewhere where I need to network, then its my job)
3) Stop trying to solve the world problems by putting my neck out for people.
4) Be more selfish.
5) Stop assuming people are going to do something that is ultimately unrealistic.
6) Don’t take it personal when people disappoint.
7) Stop expecting, just ask.
8) Hug less, but smile the same amount.
9) Listen but don’t put myself on the line to solve the problem. That’s not my job.
10) Do more on my own and provide people with the tools to help themselves, but don’t do tasks for them.
11) Listen to my stomach more.
12) Stay away from boys who are looking for a i) motivator, ii) cheerleader, iii) caregiver and look for men who are i) self sustaining, ii) educated with actual goals and mechanisms for achieving them, iii) are respectful and can be complimentary and thoughtful.

I don’t think this is a tough list. But even number one I’ve been struggling with. Its tougher than you think.

Maybe I should add… ‘make less lists’ to my list. What are you addicted to?

Curhat Colongan, Music

Your Song

It’s a little bit funny this feeling inside
I’m not one of those who can easily hide
I don’t have much money but boy if I did
I’d buy a big house where we both could live

If I was a sculptor, but then again, no
Or a man who makes potions in a traveling show
I know it’s not much but it’s the best I can do
My gift is my song and this one’s for you

And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it’s done
I hope you don’t mind
I hope you don’t mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you’re in the world

Book__diddl__friendship__german_text__13_10
I sat on the roof and kicked off the moss
Well a few of the verses well they’ve got me quite cross
But the sun’s been quite kind while I wrote this song
It’s for people like you that keep it turned on

So excuse me forgetting but these things I do
You see I’ve forgotten if they’re green or they’re blue
Anyway the thing is what I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I’ve ever see

And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it’s done
I hope you don’t mind
I hope you don’t mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you’re in the world



lovely memory on Mega Kuningan @ 17 November 2006
…Thanks for singing this song for me…
xoxoxo

Curhat Colongan, Seputar Kedodolan

Seribu Keping Puzzles (Part 1)

Semalam seorang teman tiba-tiba nonggol di kamar gue. Pada saat itu gue lagi asik berkutat menyusun seribu keping puzzles bergambar lukisan menara eiffel yang gue beli di spore awal minggu kemarin, sehingga agak ngga perduli sama kehadiran dia di kamar gue. Temen gue – yang emang udah terbiasa gue cuekin, hehe – dengan santainya langsung mengacak-acak kotak cemilan gue, mencari-cari apa yang bisa dia embat sambil komentar pendek “lo lagi ngapain sih??”. Selesai mengacak-acak kotak cemilan gue, dia duduk di sebelah gue dan dengan mulut penuh dengan makanan hasil “rampokan”nya itu, dia cuma komentar “ooooh… lagi nyusun puzzle…”. Gue sih awalnya sempet melirik sebel gitu ke dia. Tapi abis itu gue ga perduli lagi dan tetap melanjutkan acara gue menyusun puzzle.. hehehe

Sekitar 15 menit baik gue maupun temen gue sama sekali ngga ngobrol. Kamar gue cuma penuh dengan suara mulut temen gue yang lagi mengunyah makanannya ditimpali dengan suara dari televisi gue yang channel nya diganti-ganti mlulu ma temen gue itu. Then, ntah dapet dari wangsit darimana, sambil merebahkan diri di tempat tidur gue, tiba-tiba temen gue ngomong gini.. “chi, kenapa lo ngga coba mengasosiasikan kepingan puzzle yang lagi lo susun itu dengan caranya lo menyusun lagi kepingan-kepingan hati lo?”. Gue menoleh ke temen gue itu dengan pandangan maksud looooo… tapi tetep dengan ngga berkata-kata sama sekali as gue juga langsung mengalihkan pandangan gue ke puzzle yang lagi gue susun.

Gini deh filosofi-nya…” kata temen gue sambil mengambil salah satu kepingan puzzle yang udah gue pisahin dan memasangnya di salah satu lubang tersisa di gambar puzzle gue itu.

Keping ini, lo anggap aja sebagai salah satu kepingan hati lo yang lagi tercecer ntah dimana which is puzzle ini ya lo anggap lah sebagai hati lo..” lanjut temen gue.

Pada saat lo baru mulai menyusun puzzles ini, lo akan mulai dengan mencari-cari gambar yang cocok… trus lo mulai menyusun keping-keping ini sesuai dengan tempatnya kan…

Gue masih diem ngga komentar sama sekali dan mulai ngga konsen dengan susunan puzzles gue.

trus waktu lo nemu potongan-potongan yang cocok dan mulai membentuk sebuah gambar, lo seneng banget kaaan… tapi sekaligus juga jadi reseh, bertanya-tanya mana potongan yang lain, mengaduk-aduk tempat kepingan puzzles yang masih bersisa, mencari-cari potongan mana lagi yang cocok… secara ini masih banyak banget yaaaaa yang sisa.. hehehehehe”, dia ketawa-tawa sendiri sambil mencoba memasang-masang puzzles gue yang masih sisa banyak itu.

Gue masih ngga komentar sama sekali,… tapi juga ngga berusaha mencegah kelakukan temen gue yang rada norak itu. Honestly, gue penasaran menebak-nebak kearah mana omongan temen gue itu akan berlanjut.

Nah… pada waktu lo lagi berusaha menyusun kepingan-kepingan hati lo yang kemaren berantakan itu, sama ngga dengan lo nyusun puzzles ini??? Sama kaaaaan… lo menebak-nebak dari mana lo mulai sambil lo melihat mana yang cocok trus lo mulai menulis satu potong, dua potong, tiga potong, kadang-kadang ketemu yang lo anggap cocok tapi ternyata ga sama dan lo harus ngelempar potongan itu balik ke kotaknya sambil ngedumel… that’s the same things honey…

Gue masih diem ngga ngerti.

Tapi ketika kepingan-kepingan yang cocok itu udah berhasil lo temukan then udah berbentuk sebuah gambar, lo seneng banget… Lo jadi semangat untuk menyusun kepingan-kepingan yang lain. Ada kalanya lo merasa capek, then lo merasa butuh istirahat. Lalu puzzle ini lo tinggal tidur. Lo biarin aja tergeletak ngga selesai dan lo sibuk sama kehidupan lo yang lain, which is tidur.. hahahahaha…”.

Still, no comment out from my mouth. Tapi rasanya gue udah mulai mengerti dengan apa yang dimaksud sama temen gue itu.

tapi setelah selesai istirahat lo, lo kangen ma potongan-potongan puzzle lo. Penasaran banget pengen ngelanjutin walaupun dengan resiko capek, ketemu lagi dengan kepingan-kepingan yang ngga cocok yang bakal bikin lo sebel, mulai mengaduk-aduk kotak itu lagi… then lo finally dapet lagi bagian-bagian yang cocok and membentuk satu bagian gambar lagi… and lo jadi seneng banget, jadi semangat lagi… Begitu seterusnya sampe akhirnya kepingan-kepingan itu membentuk satu gambar utuh… dan lo pasti merasa suka cita banget karena satu tantangan lagi berhasil lo taklukin walaupun it’ll take a long time, bisa sebulan, dua bulan, 5 tahun…

Gue masih terdiam. Masih terbengong-bengong mencoba mencerna apa arti di balik omongan temen gue tadi. Temen gue bangkit dari duduknya, menepok pipi gue sambil bilang “Think about that, deep inside you know that it’s true… gue balik dulu yaaaa…”, lalu temen gue itu dengan tidak bertanggungjawabnya ngeloyor pergi kearah pintu kamar gue sambil ngga lupa merampok lagi satu kantong cemilan gue, meninggalkan gue yang masih termangu-mangu memandang puzzles gue yang baru seperempat jadi itu dan juga kepingan-kepingan lain yang berserakan di sekelilingnya.

Sebelum temen gue bener-bener menghilang dari pintu kamar gue, gue akhirnya setengah berteriak nanya “trus… apa yang gue dapet kalo gue udah berhasil mencocokan kepingan terakhir gue? Jalan-jalan ke  Paris??
Temen gue noleh , then said “deal with your past… forgive… and before you realize that, you already start with a new born Chichi…”, cuma itu kata-kata yang keluar dari mulut temen gue sebelum dia bener-bener lenyap dari kamar gue.

Dan gue, tambah terbengong-bengong ga jelas gitu sepeninggalnya dia. Udah ga konsen lagi nyusun puzzle. Otak gue isinya begini :  U%58#9YI###%%!!!!!(&*(H*&)!!!!
Atau dengan kata lain, PUYEEEEEENG!!!! Tapi gue juga ngga bisa berhenti mikir maksudnya temen gue itu. Lama gue merasa perlu mencerna lebih dalam kata-kata temen gue tadi then ‘till finally got the idea “OK, I got one challenge…”, gue cuma bisa ngedumel… “damn!!!! Kenapa sekarang dia jadi pinter begitu yaaaaaaa…”.

Hahahahahaha… kira-kira gue bisa ngga ya nyelesaiin puzzles yang udah gue mulai itu…

Curhat Colongan

OK, I’M PICKY… SO WHAT????

Last nite, out of the blue, I’ve got an sms which is, in simple words, "SOK TAU BANGEEEEETTTT" from someone I didn’t know who – my cellphone doesn’t even recognize the number – and too chicken to show his/her "face" before me…
anyhow, the sms in sort judge me that I’m really have a high standard to decide with who I will spend the rest of my life and dengan PEDEnya sok nasehatin gue If I’m not get my self down to earth I will be lonely forever…. Huahahahahahaha… Sok tau banget kaaaaan… And still didn’t want to show me his/her face, even just a name. CEMEN!!! She/he just told me that she/he are a friend who care about my problem… Huahahahahahahaha. I  was laughing out loud when I read that sms. Well, now I’m pretty sure that SHE/HE ARE REALLY NOT A FRIEND OF MINE, cause friends close to me must be well known about my life right now, about my dream, my thought and ga ada yang sok tau kayak dia…. hihihihi… kasian banget sih tuch orang…

okay, Talking about someone who I will spend the rest of my life with – or in sort, the right  man – are bring us to talk about commitment. It terms of relationships…commitment as a stand alone term, may not be my strong suit. BUT when I get into something I really get into it and commit myself to doing the best I can. If I believe in something, I will commit myself to the cause. And sure… I have my own criteria and standard to decide those stuff. Mind you, who doesn’t?? I think everyone has their own criteria just like mine. Not really the same, but you must have your own standard, aren’t you?? Basically, I did that because I want those commitment will be my lifetime relationship. For once in my lifetime. So, nothing’s wrong to be picky, right? more than that, to be picky is a must!!! That’s the reason I thought I have to decide that carefully. Brain, beauty and behavior are still a basic standard for me. I have a question for you guys who really know me intimately, did my standard too high and I really not down to earth? And with all I have right now (yeaaah u know it guys…), is it wrong If I make some standard to choose my right man? For sure, I want someone who much "better" than me… U know, men,.. they are all always have their own ego, right? For sure they didn’t want to look "suck" after their spouse.

I made some criteria for myself (I’m deal with that so far, make some exception to some guys I’ve close with) and haven’t found what I looking for yet, I don’t think that it’s a problem. Committing to a cause is hard, it can be very draining…inconvenient… lonely… and you often hit numerous roadblocks. I’m not always know what I am doing, but I try to make things better. When I made mistake, just face it! Everyone made a mistake.

and for YOU who send me those ridiculous sms last nite, Mind Your Own Business, Please…